help! my coworkers are having an affair!

Such a tricky topic today! I am lucky to say that I have never been in a situation where colleagues were (secretly) romantically involved, but some of my readers have asked about this. What can (or should) you do when you know what's going on and how it's affecting productivity and team morale?

Here are a few tips from the experts:

• How to Deal With a Workplace Affair (Careeralism)
• Coworkers are Having an Affair - Should I Say Something? (Ask a Manager)
• How Companies Should Handle Office Romance (Forbes)
• Why to Avoid an Office Affair (Office Life)
• Why an Office Romance is a Bad Idea (Ask the Coach)
• Office Romance: a Manager's Guide (Bloomsberg Businessweek)

There you have it! Lots of reasons not to get involved in an office romance if you can avoid it, and just as many reasons to steer clear of other coworkers' affairs.

I guess the biggest question people have is whether or not they should tell a cheating coworker's partner. Depending on the situation I would say it's a toss-up between minding your own business and making the call. Hopefully you have a very capable HR Manager you can tell when an affair interferes with business as usual!!

Any advice from readers who have been frustrated with colleagues having an affair?

studying part-time while working

I recently started with a course in Corporate Coaching. It's my first attempt at doing a part-time online course while juggling work and home and husband and hobbies ☺. I managed to submit my first assignment a few days early - so far so good.

But studying while also working full-time is a huge commitment. It's challenging to get back into that discipline, especially when it's at the expense of your free time. I also started a new job recently, so I need to spend serious time on both my job and this course I'm doing. So unless I am doing this course for a reason, and stay extremely focused, odds are I will drop out or fail.

So here are a few tips and tools I found to help us stick to it!

• Tips for Juggling Work and Study (Nurse Uncut)
• Balancing Work and Studies (Unisa)
• Guide to Part-Time Study (Kent University)
• Studying Part-Time, Working Full-Time (True story of how it's changed this girl's life)
• CPD: Top Tips for Juggling Work with Studies (Accounting Web)

What really keeps me going is the fact that this course will add significantly to my skill set and career success. So if I need to work late some evenings or give up my Saturday for a few weeks, I'm doing it with purpose.

Any advice from those of you who have successfully mastered study/work/life balance??

embracing criticism at work

Oh, how we all know the feeling of receiving criticism. Not my favorite thing, but I have learned that being open to criticism can really give your career a boost. Showing that you are open to the suggestions of others sends the message that you know you aren't perfect, creating the space for honest feedback and sincere conversations.

So here are a few do's and don'ts to help you when receiving criticism at work (especially from your manager):

DON'T get defensive. It's OK to disagree with what is being said about you or your performance, but when you kick into defense mode automatically it will send the message that you are not interested in his opinion and that you are not willing to reflect on your shortcomings. You don't want to come across as immature.

DO thank them for their opinion. "I didn't realise that I was coming across that way, thanks for telling me. My thinking in that situation was (explain your perspective)"


DON'T break down or explode. Big emotional reactions to work-related discussions are never a good idea. Work-related criticism is seldom personal, so try not to react emotionally.

DO listen to the facts and respond accordingly. "I see what you mean. My understanding of the assignment was (explain how you interpreted it), so I must have made the wrong assumptions. It wasn't my intention to (whatever you did wrong), so I will rectify it as soon as possible."


DON'T shrug it off without discussing the details. If your manager has come to you with comments regarding your performance, responding with "Fine!" doesn't show much respect.

DO investigate some of the details and show that you are willing to take action. Discussions like these create ideal opportunities for you and your boss to understand each other better, so try to make use of it


I am due for a performance appraisal myself, so I will definitely be using some of my own tips. I've been at my new job for just over a month, so I am expecting a good dose of constructive criticism. On the flipside, receiving feedback this early in my new position gives met the opportunity to get things right from the start. So despite the nerves, I am actually looking forward to it!

What are your tips for keeping your cool when receiving criticism!?

all you need to know about career coaching

Regardless of which stage of your career you are at, there will be times when a little help from an expert can really help you move to a next level. One-to-one sessions with a career coach can help you get back on track, find the motivation you've lost along the way, or address problem areas in you career. Reading a career blog (like this one) can also help you discover tools and tips to apply at work and make a difference in the long run.

I found a bunch of great posts for you on the topic:

• Are you a victim of your career? (JSM Career Coaching Blog)
• Are career coaches a waste of money? (Career Enlightenment)
• Do you need a career coach? (Psychology Today)
• Better career planning, better life (Career Coaching for Students)
• Excellent career coaching will likely allow you to do your passion (Internet Revenue Articles)

I like to think of myself as a career coach, and I learn just as much as the young professionals I advise and guide through their career blunders and insecurities. It's very rewarding to see others succeed, and I am motivated to work on my own career planning every time I write a new article!

I hope the links have been helpful and that you'll have a fantastic week!

top 10 tips for being a rock star employee

We talk about this all the time - there are so many things you can do to improve your performance and engagement at work. And regardless of who you work for, the same characteristics are praised and desired by all employers.

So instead of over-complicating things, here are my top 10 tips (and posts I wrote about them) for wannabe AMAZING employees:

1. Be on time
2. Be nice
3. Be teachable
4. Keep your promises
5. Respect everyone
6. Build your personal brand
7. Do your homework
8. Do more than the bare minimum
9. Take ownership of your job
10. Smile and wave - enjoy the ride!

Starting with the basics is always the best way to reach the top, so be sure to identify and try out a few at a time. What would your short list look like?

how to know if you are the annoying co-worker

Welcome back after a very long weekend! We have a very fun and interesting topic to discuss this Monday. I had a few giggles while writing this one, because odds are that if you are in fact annoying others at work, you will most likely NOT be aware of it and not be interested in reading advice on the topic.

But for those of you who value their personal brands and the relationships you have with colleagues,  here are a few great posts I found to help you ensure you are not a source of frustration in the workplace:

• 10 Ways you are annoying your co-workers (HR People)
• Are you the annoying co-worker? (Career Builder)
• 5 Sings you are a bad co-workers (US News Money)
• Are you the annoying guy at work? (Ask A Manager)

Hoping you also had a smile on your face while reading these, even if you may have noticed a few annoying quirks of your own! Even the most pleasant person can have habits that annoy others, so here's to polishing your professional image and adding to the positive atmosphere at work!

career advice to my 5-year younger self

I recently asked my readers what advice they would give their 5-year younger self. I have certainly learned a lot during the past 5 years of professional life, so here is my take on it:

• Make mistakes. You are young, you will make many of them. Allow yourself some room for error and learn from each one!
• Be patient. There is no way around it - you need experience in order to really know your stuff. A qualification gets you in the door, but work experience adds weight to your opinions.
• Be teachable. Allow anyone and everyone to share their experience and tips with you.
• Be pleasant. One of the most popular post on my blog speaks about the value of good manners in the work place. Even if you have no education and no work experience, good manners and respect for others will open doors for you.
• Think ahead. Just because you are still a junior and making copies all day, think about what you want to reach in the future and be sure to invest some energy in that area. Reading, attending networking events or connecting with others who have already made it in that industry.

Some of my favorite comments from readers:

From Eleanor Khupe:

• Bring your personality with you to work. Don’t be a wall flower because you’re new and you don’t know much yet. Get out there, get to know your colleagues, engage with them. The more you interact, the easier work will become.
• Ask the stupid question. Even if you think it’s stupid. It’s better to ask and get the answer than to never know.

From @mal_kozak: Don't be afraid of a challenge, apply at companies that interest you and do your research! Network, network, network! :

From @Careergeek_blog: Figure out what you want to do. Once you know that, building up on it and finding the best way to get there should be easy!


Thanks for your tips guys! If you missed our discussion on twitter, feel free to leave your comment below.

being a leader despite your youth

Good morning everyone!! I hope you had a wonderful weekend! Fall is starting to show it's colours here in SA and I am loving it.

Something I am very passionate about is leadership, and the idea that it doesn't have much to do with age. Being a leader does not mean you need to be an expert or specialist in a certain field, and has much more to do with your attitude and willingness to serve others.

Here are a few great links to inspire you this week:

• You're never too young to be a leader (Forbes)
• Who would follow you? Top 10 ways to be a leader (Careeralism)
• Young leaders: Helpful tips for developing yourself (Bridgestar)
• Why leaders don't learn from success (Harvard Business Review)
• How public speaking can help you emerge as a leader (Brazen Life)

Many times the biggest obstacle in our leadership journey is our own self-doubt. So remember to give yourself a pep-talk every now and then, and try to avoid the company of negative people who enjoy dampening your enthusiasm.

Are you ready to lead!!??

tips for jugglig multiple jobs

Some of us do it because we need the extra cash, others do it because we want to build our careers into more than just a nine-to-five job. Whatever the reason, we see more and more professionals juggling multiple jobs at the same time.

But regardless your situation or the reason for having more than one job, it can still be tough to manage your time effectively and live a balanced life. Here are a few tips from the experts:

• Are you a slasher? 5 tips for juggling multiple jobs (CommPro.biz)
• Having more than one job (Mind Tools)
• Job jugglers on the tightrope (NY Times)
• Six career tips for job jugglers (Monster)
• Making multiple jobs work for you (Vault Careers)

Career blogging/coaching is a great second "job" for me because it adds to my Human Resources career, so most of the time it really doesn't feel like a job. I enjoy it so much that I don't mind investing extra time into it. Working for myself is rewarding in other ways, and in the end I feel more motivated every morning when I get ready for my day.

If you are juggling jobs at the moment, what are the things you like (or don't like) about it??

a young pro’s guide to working from home

Modern careers are different from traditional ones in so many ways, but perhaps the biggest difference is the way modern professionals are not necessarily bound to one office or desk or set of working hours. A lot of what we do can be done from the privacy of our homes if we have a decent laptop and Internet access.

Do any of you have jobs that allow you to work flexible hours or from the location of your choice? If you do, here are a few tips to keep your relationship with your employer in tip-top shape regardless of how often you see each other face to face:

• Know what is expected of you: Whether you work in or out of the office, not having a clear understanding of what you need to achieve and produce can cause a lot of ambiguity. Have a look at your job description or have a discussion with your supervisor to ensure you have are on the same page.
• Do more: If your employer allows you the flexibility of working on your own time and at your own home, be sure to show them that you are productive and proactive. If they can see it pays off they are sure to put their trust in your time management and see you as a professional.
• Get the gear: Be sure to have the equipment and connection you need to do your work without interruptions or technical problems. If you work from home it would usually be on the condition that you be available via phone or email during regular working hours.
• Designate your work space: Working from home can be very distracting if you try to do it in the kitchen or in front of the TV. Have a spot designated for work where you can focus and concentrate on your work.
• Create boundaries: (for yourself and those around you). Be sure to plan how much time you want to spend on work and try to stick to the plan. Also inform those close to you how much time you will need daily so they know not to interrupt you just because you're there. If it helps, close your personal email accounts when you need to get your head stuck into your work.
• Regular updates: Keeping in touch and providing others with regular updates is a powerful tool that helps maintain your work relationships despite the distance between you all.

Working from home can be very rewarding! In many cases it helps you to focus on projects until they are finished instead of wasting time because you need to hang around the office until 5pm. If done correctly, you can easily juggle multiple projects or jobs and grow your career at a faster pace.

Any stories on how working from home hasn't really worked for you?

the best ways to disagree with your boss

Depending on how much you and your boss have in common you are bound to have days when you disagree with something he says. There is nothing wrong with having different opinions, but many of us get anxious when we need to talk to our bosses about it. Sure, it might not always be easy, but doing what you can to maintain an open and honest relationship from your side will make all the difference.

• Be the difference - Yes, instead of just listing what bothers you, see if you can suggest alternatives. Employers love problem solvers.
• Be respectful - Regardless of your opinion of or regard for your boss, see that you find ways to show respect while discussing the issue. Making sarcastic remarks in front oof your team regarding your boss's decision doesn't show much character from your side. Why not see this as an opportunity to build your personal brand at work.
• Check the attitude - Wild accusations and pointing fingers are sure to steer the discussion in the wrong direction. Sticking to the facts and discussing it in the most neutral way possible shows that you can handle yourself in a potentially sensitive situation without making things personal. Whatever you do with your tone of voice and body language may just rub off on whoever is with you,.
• Express it clearly - Take some time to formulate how you want to describe what is bothering you. Until you have a clear way of describing it, keep it in the back of your mind. Find ways to state simple facts and break it down into a couple of points/items for discussion.
• Ask questions - Instead of coming into the discussion with an accusing attitude, try to ask questions in order to better understand your boss's point of view. Maybe he has good reasons for making certain decisions you don't agree with.
• Agree to disagree - Sometimes we can discuss the issue as thouroghly and respectfully as possible and still not agree. Even though the outcome hasn't changed you may have had valuable discussions with your boss by now, so agree to disagree and do whatever is required of you according to his lead. Show that you are flexible and commited to company goals.

These tips work great at work but it can be useful in any conflict situation. Have any of you tried any of these approaches before?

maintaining a healthy work-life balance

Guys and girls, you know that I am passionate about maintaining a balanced lifestyle ☺. I am always thinking of new ways to prevent myself from becoming a work-a-holic. I enjoyed reading what others have to say on the topic, so I selected a few great links to keep you balanced this week:

• Strive for work-life integration, not balance (Fast Company)
• 7 Tips to manage your work-life balance (Get-It-Done Guy)
• Work/life balance - a tightrope for entrepreneurs (the Innovation Rainforest)
• 10 Ways to manage your time better (Classy Career Girl)
• Work/life balance in the home office (Diversity Journal)
• Don't forget the beach: the value of vacations (Movin' on Up)

Do you ever feel like your job is trying to swallow you whole!? No more! I hope these tips have been helpful!!

Enjoy your Monday and have a fabulous week!